Welcome Home to Your Home. You’re Home!
Designed for young professionals, who want the luxury of big city living without the big city prices, Sanctuary Crest offers a living experience unlike any other.
Welcome to your Sanctuary!
Named after the cemetery its built on, Sanctuary Crest offers:
One, two and three bedroom floorplans, depending on how you configure the bead curtain walls.
Brand new, in-unit, poo buckets.
Cold showers with intermittent, scalding hot water blasts.
A 1/1000 scale Olympic sized swimming pool.
Algae Bloom Pool Parties every weekend during the summer.
A state of the art, surround sound theater, hosting puppet shows every Thursday, until the actual theater components are installed in ninety-six months.
The thinnest walls in town.
We welcome pets! Especially those that bark.
Easy access to the freeway and train tracks located literally five feet from your front door. Only one and a half hours by bus to somewhere convenient.
Bird shit covered parking spots. Convenient visitor parking in the empty field three miles away.
A vibrant wildlife scene. Watch bears, coyotes and raccoons rummage through the overflowing trash bins.
24 hours a day, every Tuesday, every third month, every other year, management office hours.
Plans for a state of the art security gate, in-unit security alarms, and doors that lock every time, part of the time.
Free inoculations with every year long lease.
The feeling that someone or some-thing is always watching you.
Fitness center featuring a broken stationary bike and a non-HD TV, that doesn’t work.
Plans to build Phase II as soon as the swamp is drained.
Mosquito nets over each bed.
Rents that are still pretty much just as high as big city rents.
The realization that you’ll never own a home in today’s insane real estate market.
These are just some of the many amenities that Sanctuary Crest has to offer. Come in today for a tour and a free swamp boat ride!