Valentine's Day Reminds Man He's in a Relationship

After noticing the card aisle at the grocery store was stocked with rows and rows of Valentine’s Day cards, local insurance auditor Jeremy Plummer was suddenly reminded that he was in a committed relationship with a woman named Jessica Greene. The realization that he and Jessica had actually been dating for over two years came to him as he absent mindedly thumbed through the heartfelt messages printed on the inside of the cards.

“To tell you the truth I completely forgot that Jessica was my girlfriend,” said Greene as he began to notice the wall of Valentine’s Day candy located at the end of the aisle, “I mean we hang out a lot, almost every day, but we don’t do anything special, usually she just comes over and I microwave some pizza and play video games. That’s probably why I forgot that we had romantic feelings for each other.”

Upon seeing the display of pink teddy bears holding satin wrapped, heart shaped boxes of chocolate, Jeremy suddenly remembered that he and Jessica had at one point talked about moving in together and possibly having kids. “Oh man, we did talk about that, didn’t we; I’ll tell you what, I’m starting to remember that things are actually pretty serious between us.”

As Jeremy perused the teddy bears and the heart shaped candy he suddenly remembered that Jessica likes the color blue, she hates asparagus and likes to be told ‘I love you’. “Wow, it’s all coming back to me now. I think I’m in love with Jessica. I just completely forgot.” Jeremy then went on to justify his forgetfulness on too much rec league softball and nights out with the boys. “I suppose that’s why she’s always saying she feels like we never see each other anymore.”

Noticing that Valentine’s day was still over three days away, Jeremy decided against any impulsive purchases, figuring he would wait until the day itself to make an impulsive purchase.

“Now that I remember that Jessica and I are together I’m going to really plan something special for Valentine’s Day. Maybe we’ll go out for pizza instead of microwaving it.”

When asked for comment Jessica stated that she’s felt like she’s been the only one in their relationship for a long time now and is ready to call it quits. However, she did state that if Jeremy can really do something nice for Valentine’s Day, that will make up for all of it. “If he just gets me flowers, I think I’ll be happy.”

Jeremy claims to be planning something big. “I don’t want to give too much away, but let’s just say pizza is going to play a big part of it.” When asked if he is doing anything other than just taking her to pizza Jeremy said, “How did you guess that?” then followed it up with, “I’ll probably get one of those random teddy bears and a box of candy for her. But no flowers. Those are just way too expensive. Besides I can’t remember if she likes them or not.”